It’s amazing how resilient a person can be…how in the face of pain, fear, disease, loneliness, one can have a remarkable attitude. How after a tough life, one that didn’t always offer the comforts that so many of us are blessed with, a person can carry on with grace and dignity.
The difficult situation I referenced in my last post continues, and the prognosis is bleak. To respect those close to me involved, all I will say is that someone I love deeply is very sick, and the ending we all feared is becoming reality. And though we’ve thought it was a possibility and no one attempted to sugarcoat the truth, it’s still a difficult thing to hear, to process, and to acknowledge.
I’ve written hundreds of words about what a jumble my mind is right now, but none of it seems right to publish. The rantings of a crazy woman, it seems. The sleepless nights, the dark circles under my eyes, the fog that’s settling over my brain has gripped my wrists and is typing to you today. A million thoughts racing through my brain, the negative thoughts encircling the positive, bullying them and chasing them out. I believe the technical term for this is “going through a funk.”
But the sweet chaser of this bitter whiskey is that I’m lucky enough to have a caring family, a loving and emotionally-supportive husband, and friends I can call on anytime. And maybe that won’t change this outcome, but it certainly helps ease the stinging pain that burns my throat and makes my eyes well up with tears.