Tag Archives: success

Of the Creative-Type.

Is it strange that I seem to write the most around midnight? I probably can’t be the only creative-type who has insomnia issues, mostly related to an influx of thoughts once it gets dark, right?

Lots of things are flowing through my brain right now, mostly in large part to the big project Tom and I have been working on for the last six months or so. This website is something that we’ve spent countless hours on, between the actually crafting of the content to managing the behind the scenes technical stuff, legal stuff, and marketing. It’s an idea that we’ve toyed around with since July, and we are so excited with the direction it’s taken and the reception it’s received.

Over the long winter break, we had two thirteen-hour car rides, in which many hours were spent discussing the site, working on outlines for new posts, new segments, marketing plans, and more. When we came home, totally invigorated and excited for all the new things we had planned, a funny thing happened. The website got a huge, huge promotion, landing on the front page of Reddit’s fitness forum {the largest and most frequently visited of its kind}. Not only were the number of visitors mind-boggling, but so were all the comments and feedback: the majority were overwhelmingly positive. In fact, I’d venture to say that 98% of it was positive. I still can’t quite wrap my brain around that.

It’s gratifying to see something you love so much be so well accepted. That’s obvious, right? But it was also so exciting to see this tiny baby project that we’ve fed and nurtured every night for hours go out into the big, scary world and succeed. When we started this, neither one of us had any direct experience in running a blog of this magnitude. Sure, I write here, and I write at my day job, but I don’t write about nutrition or cooking. I’ve never had to back up a database or try to troubleshoot a PHP log. But we’ve learned as we’ve gone, and dang it, I’m proud of me.

As I {sadly} get older, the urge to put roots down and start to settle into a typical lifestyle is becoming greater. It’s especially more profound when I visit back home and find all my friends buying houses, having babies, and getting promotions. It makes me start to question what I’m doing, and if it’s sustainable, and maybe I should just change gears altogether. And then I came back to Carolina, channeled all my creative energy into this project, and returned to the little bubble that is our unconventional life. And then yesterday happened, and it reaffirmed what I’ve known in my soul all along: my roots are in my projects, not in where I live. I am happiest when I am writing or creating, or learning new things. It soothes my soul in ways I could never form words to explain.

I am humbled and grateful to be of the creative-type, even if it means a few nights spent wide away, the only light in the house coming from my computer.

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Vindicated.

There is no sweeter feeling in this world, in my humble opinion, than the moment of vindication.

The moment you find the answer you’ve been searching for, even when people said you were wasting your time.

The moment you conquer the obstacle in front of you, when everyone else said it was impossible.

The moment your leap of faith pays off, even though your inner critic convinced you it was a bad idea.

Yesterday, I prevailed in a battle I had been fighting for over a year. It’s been a long, slow battle with my health that has caused me to think I was crazy…even a hypochondriac at times. But the symptoms were there, hovering around my person and making my life a living hell. The past few months have intensified, and I became a mad woman, grasping at unknown threads of hope and pulling hard. And after countless hours in waiting rooms, endless vials of bloods, over a thousand dollars in tests…the results were in black and white on this piece of paper. I had six times the normal level of this toxic substance in my body. SIX. TIMES.

It has never felt so good to hear bad news. {And yes, now that I have a diagnosis, I shall be just fine in short order!}

In any situation, when you invest so much time and effort into a project…be that in a hobby or a job, a personal war or a private fight, that moment when the weight is lifted from your shoulders in righteous victory is unparalleled by any other feeling.

As if telekinetically linked, my husband beat his PR today, in a big way. It was an amazing moment for him, and for me {I’m lucky enough to watch his training sessions broadcasted live!}. I watched him conquer the number that had been staring him down for weeks, mocking him, pushing him, making him sweat and swear. In one swift and easy movement, he beat it. He won that battle. As I screamed at the computer screen and he grunted with ferocity, that bar went up, and the screaming and the grunting dissolved into cheers, whoops, and a victory dance.

It’s these moments of vindication, the taste of victory and power and pride, that we both live for. We fight for every battle, push for every win, and rejoice in our moments of success. And when we fail, we take a deep breath and push onward. Sometimes I worry about the physical distance between us. I wonder if 2,200 miles is enough to break even the healthiest of marriages. I don’t worry incessantly about it, but it’s a seed that has settled in my dusty brain and is taking up precious space. On long days when we’re in foul moods, or busy days when we don’t have time to talk, I can feel that seed burrow a little deeper. And on days like today, when without even exchanging words, we both feel vindication, that seed shrivels up and vanishes.

We are competitors, both of us. He proves it daily, in a very physical way, while I shroud myself in quiet strength. We never give up. We fight for love, for bragging rights, for happiness, for each other…for sweet vindication.

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